Water! Water!

Well, that’s a little dramatic but in a few minutes I can no longer have anything to eat or drink.  I’m having surgery in the morning so the cutoff is midnight.  I’ll miss my Diet Coke.

I made a few lists about a week ago so I would be sure to get everything done before going under the knife.  I almost got it all done.  There is still some laundry to do and I didn’t get the water in the fishtank changed out.  Why do I feel like I’ve failed when I accomplished so much?  Just because I didn’t have time to do the last couple of things.  The typical cry of women everywhere.  If only…  There’s just too many lists and not enough hours in the day.  It’s not my fault, it’s Father Time’s fault.  Yeah….that sounds good.

I’m the only two-legged person still stirring in our house.  I should also be in bed, but I have to get up at 3 A.M.  Why even try to sleep?  I have so much in my head that I don’t feel the slightest bit sleepy even though I KNOW I should TRY to sleep.  I’m going to just go with the flow and not stress over whether I should or should not sleep.  See what I mean about all the stuff in my head?  I think it’s just that I’m a little shaky about getting put to sleep and waking up with a ceramic hip.  I mean, for 59 years I’ve been hanging around with the same old calcium bony thing.  Am I cheating my hip out of life?  Or has it already done me wrong?  I mean it’s been hurting me for about 15 years now and made my life fairly miserable.  Doesn’t that give me cause to hate it and to throw it away?  Yeah, I guess, but if we threw away everything that caused us pain no one would ever have a marriage that lasted or children that lived.  So pain can’t be the only reason to part with a body part.  Look at all the elderly folks who’ve lived with pain the biggest part of their adult lives.  Most of them still have all their original parts; they never threw them away….but they’re still in pain.  Oh, yeah, that’s why I’m doing this, so I won’t be in pain the rest of my adult life.  And so I can walk again without a limp.  And so I can walk my poor little doggies around the subdivision again.  I wonder why they think I stopped.  I hope they don’t think it’s because I didn’t want to.  I wonder if they think of those things.

One of the things I’m really looking forward to post-op is being able to walk the dogs again.  They love it so, and I could use the exercise myself.  And I could use the sunshine since I have a vitamin D deficiency.  (Vitamin D, the sunshine vitamin!)  And I’ll be able to go shopping and not have to look for every bench, or to hurry the grandkids along so I can sit in the car.  And I’ll be able to buy groceries and take my time instead of hurrying or not buying everything I need at one time.  And I’ll be able to do things with Ronnie (go to the park, watch the sunsets together, etc.) like we used to do.  I’ll never be able to run again like I did when I was young.  And I’ll never jump rope, slide down a slide, parachute from a plane or square-dance.  But when’s the last time I’ve done those things anyway?  (Parachute from a plane?  Where’d I come up with that from?  Grabbing straws, are we?)

It all boils down to just being able to move again without pain, no limp, no handicap sticker.  Just a healthy happy SSP (sorta senior person).  Senior starts at the age of 60 (I know because my favorite husband is a Senior and I’m having a ball teasing him about it).  As a senior we get discounted meals at some local restaurants.  Ronnie says no thank you, he wants the entire portion, thank you very much!  He’s not ready to get the child’s plate yet.

Mimi got spayed yesterday and is still shaky but her tail is wagging again so with the help of a few more pain pills I think she’ll be just fine.  Gypsy got one of her baby teeth pulled, the only one that still existed.  I didn’t know until Friday that any of them still existed.  But she’s doing fine, too, back to griping at the other dogs and licking my face so I don’t think her mouth is too sore.  I stopped giving her pain pills; they won’t cure bitchiness.  If they would, think of the change possible in me after being on Vicodin since 2008……too bad.

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